Chapter 1: Love?
Simon was never a lucky kid, never did, and never was. Borned into a broken family, Simon lived with his mother and sister, his father was "kicked" out of the house. He was seven then, He didn't smile much, didn't care about anything either. Years passed and he got a close clique of friends. Although he never shared a lot about his problems, his friends always knew what was wrong with him, be it relationship problems, or even family problems. His personality changed, along with whoever is with him. When he is with his family, he will be quiet, innocent. When he is with his friends, he tends to be rebellious, disturbing the surrounding people. He hated his life, mostly because he was alone all the time. His mother and sister were both working, and hardly spend any time with him. He felt lonely, and soon thought it was better off this way.
He went out one cold and breezy night, in search for the meaning of his existence. Looking into the forests, and then at his feet. He was exhausted, sick and curious. He staggered to a bench, sat there for awhile and coughed hard. He had suicidal thoughts. He knew it was the only way to end his misery, but also, he knew that it would be meaningless. He was wise, but silly at times. He gathered his remaining energy, and walked the rest of the way home. It was a long road, but he didn't want to go back so early. As he walked along the stretch, he looked at everything by him. Nothing interesting, so he looked down on the path, thinking of how wonderful life would be if he could share all of his feelings and problems with someone else.
When he reached his house, his mother was sitting on the sofa, watching the television. After being reprimanded for coming back home so late, he went to shower. Waters flowed down his face, but was it really water, or was it his tears? He walked out of the toilet and went to his room. He jumped onto his bed, thinking about random things. Things started to fade in his head, and he fell asleep soon.
Woken up abruptly by his mother at 3 am, he was frustrated. He told his mum to go to bed, for he would be sleeping in his own room today. He took his mp3 player and put on his ear phones. With the music set to full volume, it clogged out his thoughts, feelings and sounds around him.
He went out with his friends the very next day, with a headache. Struggling hard to keep up with his friends, his vision was blurring. In a distance, he spotted someone familiar; someone he thought only appeared in his dreams. She had big brown eyes, with silky long hair, an addictive laughter and an eye captivating smile. All focus was on her now, with his eyes was glued to her, he whispered to himself “I really want her”, but he lacked of everything. Confidence, courage, looks, money even personality.
She was walking away, and he knew if he loses sight of her, his life would be even more screwed up then before. His friends didn't take notice of him looking at her. Simon told his friends he will be going to the toilet, some of his friends wanted to accompany him, but he told them to go ahead as the movie was starting soon. They agreed and gave him his ticket to enter into the cinema after he was done.
He gathered his courage as he walked briskly towards her. It felt like a long walk, even though she was only by the exit a few meters away. He finally reached his destination. His heart was shivering, and almost pumping out of his shirt. He took a deep breath and greeted her. She greeted back politely and Simon asked for her name and number after. Time seemed to have stopped at that moment. It was his most nerve wrecking moment. Simon had a presentiment that she would walk away. “My name is Tiffany”, she said laughing shyly. Her friends were all glaring at Simon as he was sweating profusely. They exchanged contacts and walked off to separate places.
He went off to the cinema, watched the movie with his friends, like nothing ever happened. He didn't want to tell them because he is always getting embarrassed by girls who dump him right after he tells them that he's got a new girlfriend.
Time flew by so fast, with his new friend. He spends most of his time, either talking to her on the internet, or on the phone. Bonds grew stronger, and he wanted her for himself. He met up with her several times, but he decided that today is going to be the day where he professed his love for her. While walking to the train station where they were supposed to meet, he thought, “My luck has finally changed! “. Ecstatic to find out about what will happen, he even got a gift for her, and wrote a letter for her. He finally smiled, and looked at the brighter side.
As he got to the station where she was, he saw Tiffany with another guy. He thought it was just a mere friend whom she brought along or bumped into. But as he was walking to her, the guy placed his arms around her. Simon's jaw dropped, his heart beat stopped, his hope, crushed like a puny insect. He wanted to walked up to her, and give her the gifts but the guy whom Tiffany was with, stood up and scolded Simon, snatched the gifts from Simon’s hands and threw them at him. He told him to stay away from her and never look for her again. Simon's heart is crushed, tears rolled down his rosy cheeks. He wanted to have a last look of Tiffany. But what he saw, was her laughing, laughing at his pathetic state. Blinded by love once again, Simon stormed off. He went into the next train that arrived, fumed with anger.
Never did he expect this to happen. Filled with misery, he went down to a nearby playground by his house. Sat there and looked up to the dark blue sky. The skies were turning grey, so was his mood. He punched the walls of the void deck, kicked them as well. He was crying, like he never did before. Letting out all his misery, pain and suffering. Although he knew, other people has worst lives, he knew his was lousy as well. He finally calmed down, summarizing what has happen in the past few weeks. He had the best days with her, and the worst days as well. He loved her very much. But all he got back were bittersweet memories.
